I was coming into the bathroom today and as I was coming, this guy I see periodically was coming out. I remember him, not because he’s one of three guys on the fragrance side, but because he has the worst toupee I’ve ever seen. It’s horrendous. It looks a fluffy black cat perched onto his head, not quite obscuring the grey hair on the sides. It’s almost as big as a cat too. I bet he’s flushes to hide his farts and shit smells.

Back to me and my butt. I dropped a crowd pleaser, with some nice juicy squeaks and loud splashes on the water. Nice to see my poop is a lot firmer than it’s been. For as firm as it feels, the hot streaks and cleanup says otherwise.